Quick Hits #8

Yay, Kobe's Back!!! And even better, the best basketball player in the NBA upstaged his return with a heck of a performance. Stock Up: LeBron James, Stock (and trousers) Down: Kobe Bryant

Jose Canseco said he, Mar McGwire and Jason Giambi and injected steroids together. And, on a separate occasion, he, Rafael Palmeiro, Pudge Rodriguez and Juan Gonzalez did the same, while our current president was the owner of the team. Canseco has hit rock bottom, although I bet some of the stories has some significant truths to them. I was unaware that steroids not only made you really strong, and have uncontrollable fits of rage, but also the inabilitiy to keep your mouth closed. Plus, who really thinks that Jason Giambi of all people would use steroids? I mean, he only allegedly admitted to using steroids to a Grand Jury, but what really is a "Grand Jury"?
Stock Down: Jose Canseco, Major League Baseball, Me (for not getting in on the steroids and making the Major Leagues when I was younger).

The Illinois Fighting Illini won again this past Saturday over the Wisconsin Badgers, and looked pretty impressive in the process. They will now be the number 1 ranked team in the countty for 11 straight weeks. "Experts" keep selecting North Carolina to beat Illinois in the Finals. Meanwhile, the Duke Blue Devils beat the number 2 ranked North Carolina Tar Heels and then Duke lost to Maryland. Now we will hear that the Big Ten is watered down and the ACC is so good, that there is never a break. You know, those same breaks that Illinois gets when they go to Wisconsin facing a 38 game home winning streak and into Michigan State. Stock Up: The Fighting Illini Stock Down : So-called "Experts"

Pitchers and Catchers are going to report to Spring Training for Baseball right around the same time the NHL owners officially cancel the season. Boy, I was so worried that I would have nothing to do around this time of year except watch the NBA and the NCAA and no NHL. Oh wait, I never watch the NHL. The NHL to me was always a 10 minute time filler on Sportscenter between the NBA, NCAA, off-season information in the NFL and Major League Baseball. What are we going to do? I have a friend from Canada who said that the NHL, which is thought to be such a part of Canadian life, this lockout has allowed people to decide how much they care about it. Uh oh, the four teams that get any attendance outside of Detroit for the NHL are starting to have second thoughts. Can you say MHL (Minor-League Hockey)? which can be loosely translated into, No one Cares.
Stock Up: Canadians (for realizing how boring hockey is) Stock Down: NHL (Nothing like squabbling over millions of dollars)

Karl Malone and Barry Larkin each officially retired both with the teams they entered their respective leagues. (Malone signed a contract simply to retire a Jazz, Larkin only played for the Reds). So the end of the Golden Age of sports when players played for one team and played for the love of the game has officially seen two more players call it quits. Stock Up: Karl Malone, Barry Larkin Stock Down: the NBA and Major League Baseball for losing two class players

"Lefty" Phil Mickelson last year shed the title of "Best Player on the Tour without Winning one of the Majors" when he won the Masters. Now, he has won back-to-back tournaments with his Sunday win at Pebble Beach. Mickelson is now the hottest player on the tour (and his wife is pretty hot all on her own). Vijay Singh did not even make the cut for the tournament. Although the Shot of the Day did not come from Mickelson, but rather, comedian BillMurray dropped a 150-yard approach shot to about 4 feet from the cup. He even used a little backspin to get the ball there. Stock Up: Phil Mickelson, Bill Murray Stock Down: Vijay Singh

On Saturday, the Underachieving Minnesota Timberwolves fired coach Flip Saunders and replaced his with Kevin McHale. Promptly, and right where the Timberwolves left off prior to Saunder's dismissal, the (overachieving) Chicago Bulls, came in to Minneapolis and defeated the T-Wolves 87-83 behind Ben Gordon's 21 points and Kirk Hinrich's 15 points. Stock Up: Chicago Bulls (Continue to win) Stock Down: Flip Saunders, Kevin McHale, the Minnesota Timberwolves

Catchers and Pitchers report in 24 hours...also known as tomorrow. Spring is almost here (for those of us in cold places.)